"Somebody should tell us, right at the start of our lives, that we are dying. Then we might live life to the limit, every minute of every day. Do it! I say. Whatever you want to do, do it now! There are only so many tomorrows." - Michael Landon

Hadn't intended to write about this @ all, just like the London bombing I guess I didn't want to know. Some things are so hard for me to wrap my brain around. Not having cable, makes it a bit easier to not get caught up in the hype, so Sunday/Monday I picked thru various websites to see what was up with the storm, but never felt the urgency or fear vibe I got from others.

And it feels hollow to make a public statement of support on my site b/c I seriously doubt anyone in the damaged areas are getting online much less stopping here, so I keep my thoughts to them, offline.

Today I decided to watch a bit of news and saw the coast guard rescuing people from the roofs of their homes and tears came to my eyes.

And what I thought as I watched the helicopter lower itself down and saw people (shell-shocked?) on their roofs w/nothing but the clothes on their back was...

Did it matter if they were republican or democrat?
Straight or gay?
Christian, Muslim or Jewish?
Black? White? Man? Woman? Child?
Did it matter if they had aids? Were an illegal alien? Was a drug addict?

The rescuer didn't pause before picking them up to go down a list of things that keeps us divided and bickering. They just picked them up, no questions asked, and they held each other, spinning round & round ever so slowly.

Why does it take a tragedy to bring people together? Don't answer that. I already know. No mother who has a child that was killed has ever advocated for others to die the same way. Whenever a tragic situation occurs, the victim usually says, "I don't want anyone else to go thru what I went thru".

Watching the evening news, there was scores of people walking. To where? They didn't even know. They showed a 74 year old woman who'd been walking for hours and I almost broke down in tears again and had a strong urge to get in my car and drive over there and pick up as many that can fit, mainly the 74 year old who could be my grandma, and bring them back to stay in my apartment.

I wish my brain could grasp what my heart can't bear...

And I dunno, maybe it's the crazy radical in me, but I'm thinking, maybe just maybe, when things like this happen, the entire focus of the country should be on assisting those in need. The tv should reflect that, meaning commercials on TBS promoting Twister is a bit tasteless, and perhaps TJ MAXX can hold off on the Labor Day weekend sale bonanza and those dumb ass rappers shooting each other @ a party for chrisesakes, need to get over themselves and stop the madness.

If all my "stuff" vanished in a split second, how would I cope? I looked around my apartment and wondered, what would I grab? All the things I prize and cherish that can't even fit in my arm. All the things and comforts I take for granted. And the reality is, just like every major tragedy before, it'll resonate for a few days and over time, the news'll move on. I'll move on. Until the next time, I guess. And you never really think it could be you. I wondered if any of those people saw the tsunami last December and thought, how surreal it looked, and less than a year later, were faced w/their own surrealness.

They are like refugees...where will they go? And the aquarium was destroyed too. So the fish went back to their natural home?

Too many pictures to claim any as a favorite, which in light of things sounds horrid to say, but these, for various reasons, bring the tears.

The hole they cut out to flee.


Saved.


Holy. Shit. I don't know if I'd survive that.


Race...age...creed...nationality...sexual preference...religion...political affliation...DO NOT MATTER.


A family. We all love our pets.


Relief & love.


He looks so sad & scared, but he scampered to the roof. Would a cat have done the same?


There is a scene in Titanic, when amidst the scampering to survive, an old couple settles in bed and hold each other. I wonder if those who couldn't make it to their attic, or didn't have one, shared a moment like that.


Barefoot and running for cover.


A parent's love.


Innocence is bliss and his (looks like a boy) pampered booty and oblivious look that only a baby can have, makes me smile thru the tears.

And that's why I didn't want to write about this. Not b/c I'm cold and uncaring but I know me. If I think too hard about it and the unfairness of it and the randomness of it and let it consume my mind so that the next storm makes me ill to my stomach, the same way a low flying plane does ever since 9/11 or any loud bang since the war started, I'll just throw my hands up w/everything. Again.

And maybe that's why I had to write this b/c I'm dangerously close to that moment tonight.

I guess life goes on.

Till the day it doesn't.

It's all about you today. Here's some more thoughts about what was said on Thursday's rant (where you can read them all in context).

Thanks as well to those that simply said, "I feel the same way too." That really helps me feel not so alone in this, like I'm going nuts, b/c other people get it too.

Marta:

it's just ridiculous to keep dumping money into a healthcare system that treats the symptoms of our lifestyles, but doesn't value the concept of preventive care and education about preventive care.

Marta I totally agree. There is something warped, sinful even, that preventive care and education aren't the norm. I saw an infomercial about an insurance company that rewards healthy patients. They give them reduced prices or gifts for going to the gym and making other healthy changes in their lives. The companies viewpoint was, it's cheaper to give away a CD or DVD now vs. treating someone for obesity related diseases later on in life.

I only spend about $15 a week on groceries! But I only eat beans, rice, tofu, frozen veggies, tilapia, apples, oranges, and bananas.

$15 a week!?!? I am so emailing you later on tonight! Hell I may even pay you to ship me groceries, b/c even w/shipping costs that sounds a lot cheaper than what I fork out. Even on my most conservative weeks, it's hard not to go over 30 bucks, and that's cutting it down from $50.

"Never regret. If it's good, it's wonderful. If it's bad, it's experience." – Victoria Holt

Oh joy, today's birthday shout out is a twofer!

Sooz!

Find her over @ Says Me - It's never too late to be who you might have been.

AND her fraternal bday twin

Digity!

Find him over @ TheDigity.com - they're just words.

Sooz shares her special day with Mod Squad cutie Peggy Lipton & Charlie's Angel copy cat Cameron Diaz. While Digity shares his special day with Tennis stud Andy Roddick. RAWR!

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My prayers & sympathy are sincerely w/the people in New Orleans and those in the path of the storm that due to not having adequate transportation or whatever emotional reason, could not or would not leave.

However, for that jackass reporter over @ WFOR news that ran his dumb ass out into the storm to test the wind that blew down a TREE only to end up crouched behind a mailbox, this after panting like he's been running on a treadmill, after trying to walk only a handful of steps, I was really hoping he'd blow away like the radials that whizzed past him.

So yea the fast helped to clear my head a bit, ideally I'd loved to have done it longer, realistically I'd hate to be slumped over my car driving down the expressway by the middle of the week.

This is the 2nd time I've consciously fasted, last year I did it almost 72 hours, but paranoia set in and somewhere around 9-10pm Sunday night and I had some soup. I've been toying w/fasting @ various points this year, but it's something I am moved to do. If I plan it too much in advance, I wimp out and hunger makes me delirious.

I spent sometime thinking about what I ranted about on Friday and how my frustration can either paralyze me from doing anything or depress me from having hope. I'm a person of action, sometimes to my detriment. Here's a story to prove that.

::cue back in the day music::

Weight-loss fads come and go. But no matter what you hear, limiting fat in your diet, particularly saturated fat and trans fat, is one of the most important diet changes we can make for optimum health. The Mayo Clinic offers 10 ways you can cut down on fat.

angie!

Find her over @ The Final Twenty - My Battle to goal ends here.

She shares her special day with Mr. Lifestyles of the Rich & Famous Robin Leach.

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Wow wow wow. You all left some GREAT replies. I hadn't planned on being ghost the last few days, but I ended up fasting for a day and a ½, nothing but water, from midnite Thursday till around 3 pm Saturday. When I said I lost my appetite, I so wasn't kidding. I had planned to fast the entire 3 days and spend the rest of this week detoxing. I broke the fast early, b/c part of me gets paranoid when it goes too well. Like I wasn't hungry @ all. I did get headaches, but that was to be expected since I've been drinking cokes @ least 1-2 times a day for the last few weeks. Even breaking the fast was primarily liquids, I had soup and have been drinking lotsa water. There's more good stuff I got out of it, but I still have a dull headache and being on the computer isn't helping. The computer is another thing I fasted from so to see all those replies this afternoon, I was blown away. This week I want to highlight some of the comments that were left and just when I thought I was ranted out, got it all out of my system, you all gave me even more to think about Hope you all had a good weekend and now I'm going to lay back down for a bit. And if this post is a bit choppy, blame the lack of food . I'll be back on solids tomorrow.

Can you believe this is the 6th week? It feels like just yesterday my crazy brain dreamt up a group challenge and here we are in the final week.

Due to the upcoming holiday weekend and some people meeting, even exceeding, their goals, you can use this post as an early check in. I've added 3 smilies just for the babes. This way you can "click in" how much you've lost:

Next week, I'll post a 5lb challenge wrap up thread as a place for anyone who was out of town over the weekend to check in.

Now end this week with a bang, you've still got 7 days to eek out 1lb, and as teensy as that sounds, we all know how great it is when they all add up.

No wonder every Thursday I've been having such deep thoughts about food and exercise after listening to the local AM station, it's by design. Thursdays is 2 hours of health specific topics. Two weeks ago it was the naturopath who said the heart isn't designed to tote excess weight. Last week it was a diabetes segment that took away my appetite for hours & as much as I wanted to, I couldn't even write about it. Today it's about the chemicals in our foods that alter our body chemistry.

Yesterday the newspapers wrote about The Trust for America's Health report documenting obesity is rising like all across America w/Southern folks getting fatter fastest.

1. Mississippi. 2. Alabama. 3. West Virginia. 4. Louisiana. 5. Tennessee. 6. A tie between Texas, Kentucky and Michigan. South Carolina was 10th, Arkansas 11th, Georgia 12th, North Carolina 16th, and Virginia 22nd. Of the Southern states, only Florida was in the leaner half of the nation — ranking 38th.[source]

Out of the 50 states only one, Oregon (go beavers!) didn't have an increase in obesity.

It all leaves me shaking my head and thinking, Dear lord, where on earth is this country headed?

"If you watch how nature deals with adversity, continually renewing itself, you can't help but learn." - Bernie Siegel

Red text my emphasis.

Enjoy an occasional splurge then get back on track - by Michele Stanten

It happens--a piece of cheesecake here, a missed workout there. But diet detours needn't become guilt-wracked weight loss disasters.

Proof: When researchers put 142 overweight people on the same weight loss program, one group followed it for 14 straight weeks; another took a 6-week hiatus at the midpoint; the final group took a 2-week break every few weeks. Eleven months later, everybody had lost an average of 16 pounds.

"It's not the breaks that hurt weight loss efforts," says study author Rena Wing, PhD, of Brown University Medical School. "It's your negative reactions to the breaks and the subsequent downward spiraling." So enjoy your time off, and then get back on track. [source]

Well then. I'll be continuing to enjoy my time off for another...oh...10 days or so.

Smitherene!

Find her over @ thoughts + observations about doctors, weight loss, and having a baby.

She shares her special day with Steve Guttenberg aka Sgt. Carey Mahoney of Police Academy fame.

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B thinks of me when she sees this:

That's funny, cuz I think of me when I see this:

Me of the scuffed up knees, that is.

Nike's on the "real woman" bandwagon (see also: thighs & legs). I'm doubtful the Dove ads had much to do w/it since they don't necessarily whip out huge ad campaigns overnight. But it does tell me that by this time next year we may see more "natural" woman in ads. And why is that good?

Namely myself, b/c I so don't want to get dooced.

Since I never explained it before, here's the deal on whom I talk about on my site.

"Behold the turtle. He makes progress only when he sticks his neck out." – James Bryant Conant

So today I'm wearing pants formerly known as the belly slicers, which going forward will be known as the hip riders since that is where the waistband currently resides. Can I hear it for the ankle grazers? B/c my ultimate goal in life is to be able to pull these bad boys up, w/o unzipping them, @ which point they'll promptly fall down to my ankles like the pair of oversized clown pants that they truly are. *scowls*

It was then brought to my attention I have lost a lot of weight, tell that to my scale whydontcha, and I was asked how'd I do it. All the while I'm shoving a breadstick & pepperoni slice of pizza (those bastards were finally delivering on Saturday B) into the microwave while simultaneously banging the coke machine (hmm that don't read too good) for my drink.

I said, completely tongue in cheek, "Uh, for one, not by eating Pizza Hut & drinking soda."

But they know me so I reminded them of what they've seen me eat for lunch the last few months, frozen dinner w/lotsa veggies, and casually told them that I walk in the morning.

I totally downplayed the walking thing b/c who really wants to hear that I grunt wheeze and sweat myself silly @ an insane hour?

Right. No one.

As they were leaving they pointed out again, that I lost a ton of weight and it's so obvious and to keep up the good work.

Ok my day got better again and the tiny part of me that's been reveling & totally enjoying not being all strict w/myself & toying w/being sloth-like again, has been sufficiently guilted.

And my day was going so well

There are 4 life stages when your body clings to fat. Here's what you can do to lose it.

"Your metabolism slows by about 5% each decade, which means that at age 35 you're burning about 75 fewer calories a day than you did at age 25,"

[snip]

For looking and feeling your best, the American Institute for Cancer Research in Washington, DC, recommends gaining no more than 11 pounds--for life--after age 18. Tell that tidbit to my tummy, hips & thighs. - Renee

What you can do with diet, exercise, and behavior:

Beat. Pooped. I'm tired.

How tired am I?

I'm sooooooooooooo tired, I've been resorting to my cold cola pick me ups. Nuff said.

"The first and most important step toward success is the feeling that we can succeed." - Nelson Boswell

I've officially closed the challenge to new members, though one could lose 5lbs in the next two weeks, I'd like to promote the safe & healthy, ie boring, 1-2lbs per week plan. So those of you who joined us in the last two weeks have been added to the list.

4 weeks down.

One entire month is gone. Take a moment and pat yourselves on the back, you stuck with the challenge despite the ups & downs and bouts of frustration.

There's just two weeks left, the race to Labor Day even, so much can "happen" in two weeks. If you saw the entry I posted about the scale sticking, and your scale's been stuck for the last 4 weeks, could the final two weeks yield you some beaker of fat type results? Could be. There's only one way to find out: don't quit.

And b/c I'm just so quotastic, I'll leave share this nugget:

"The person who removes a mountain begins by carrying away small stones." - Anonymous

What ever your mountain of fat maybe, consider these ½lb to 1lb losses your small stones to bigger and better losses.

So I finally got one of my pet projects launched: the food reviews have moved to their own domain, let reneegetsfit.com's bandwidth rejoice!

Lookit, I even found time to craft a teeny banner:

Been squirreled away all weekend long making it happen, I still have a few odds and ends to tend to, nothing is ever as perfect as I'd like it to be. But for the most part, it's done and starting today the old review site that was on this domain is now being redirected over there.

I toyed w/doing a complete redesign, but I don't feel that creative right now. Besides, the overall page layout works really well. To compensate, I swapped the background & changed the link colors to match, I jazzed up a logo just a smidge and voila, a "newish" site is born.

Oh & my apologies to those of you subscribed to a few entries that got a weird spam email promoting google today. *sigh* that idiot has been banned and luckily I got them after 4 entries, they were well on their way to spamming my entire site.

"People usually fail when they are on the verge of success. So give as much care to the end as to the beginning." – Lao-Tzu

"Everyone has talent. What is rare is the courage to follow the talent to the dark place where it leads." - Erica Jong

"Dreams come true. Without that possibility, nature would not incite us to have them." – John Updike

Slow losing beaker babes, rejoice! (Red text is my emphasis.)

Why you don't seem to be losing weight - by Sarah Robertson

Q: I started a weight loss program 2 weeks ago, but the scale hasn't budged. Why?

A: It's not uncommon for people to lose weight at different rates, even if their eating and exercise habits are the same. The most likely explanation is fluid retention, says Franca Alphin, MPH, RD, nutrition director of student health services at Duke University Medical Center in Durham, NC. Some people are just more prone to retaining fluids.

To prevent this, watch your salt intake, drink more water, and be patient. Come next week, you may suddenly drop the few pounds you were hanging on to as your body starts adjusting to your new regimen, Alphin says.

However, if you don't see a change by the fourth week, reevaluate what you're doing. If you started walking, great. But realize that, at most, you'll be burning about 100 calories for each mile walked. Since there are 3,500 calories in 1 lb of fat, you'll get faster results by also trimming some calories. Most people can expect to lose an average of 1 to 2 lb a week. (If you have 10 lb or less to lose, the weight will come off more slowly: about 1/4 to 1/2 lb a week. [source]

Speaking of kids, as much as I love their peals of laughter, and I do really I do, sometimes the commercials w/those tiny beings annoy the beejeebus outta of me. [Back in the day Joy wrote a HY-larious rant on a Chef Boyardee commercial. Just rereading it has me wiping the tears outta my eyes. Oh mercy.]

There is a commercial on TV for a kids meal replacement shake. Mom and daughter are going down the aisle and everything the mom picks up, baby girl simply doesn't like.

"I don't like broccoli."

"I don't like milk."

"I don't like fruits."

She whines pitifully as mom keeps a brave face in search of the magical product baby girl will like. She finds said product and all is well.

OH. MY. GAWD.

My mother would backslap me so hard if I paraded down the aisle, actually her mom was pushing her in the cart - my behind woulda been walking, acting like that. Which explains why she never took me grocery shopping. I ate what she bought or I didn't eat.

But there are so many freaking things wrong w/that commercial I don't even know where to begin.

So I'm a kid @ heart. Truly. If there is one thing I miss from cable, it's the cartoon network. I can watch cartoons 24/7 and am usually the lone adult sitting way in the front row when a kiddie movie is released.

Their peals of giggles @ the silliest things, makes me laugh even more than the movie does. For that moment in time, I'm a bit less cynical about world and tad more hopeful about life.

"Be yourself. No one can ever tell you you're doing it wrong." - James Leo Herlihy

Dudettes, you all gave such amazing rants. I get a perverse pleasure hearing other people get up on a soapbox *snort*.

As an aside, the other day I talked about discrimination in a general sense. For the record, I can't recall a time in my life I have ever been in a blatantly racist situation, like being called the N word or being barred from someplace. Now I've had times when I've experienced discrimination or ignorance, stupid things like being followed in stores, profiled they call it, and other minor things, but to date I haven't had face to face encounters.

So me talking about my experiences being black and tying it in to the media messages and my day to day encounters, is really an effort to share with others who may take for granted that b/c the "thin is in" is the new look, we all want the same body. I don't necessarily internalize those messages the same way and will try to point out why. Or why I'd fret if my booty got too small b/c culturally the booty means something.

I do hope my buddies of all races don't take what I'm saying as me raging against any race, rather I try to understand people, period. But I'm no fool. I understand the structure of the society we operate under so the messages of beauty, even the subtle ones, come thru loud & clear.

Now for another back in the day story, aka Hair Lessons 101:

"Use what talent you possess: the woods would be very silent if no birds sang excep

The last few weeks, I've been cleaning up my server, deleting old & duplicate copies of my site that I archived during the site crash of 2005. As I went thru those files, revisiting some old entries, I had some interesting epiphanies.

I once said about the politics of posting:

The tricky thing about having a site is the pressure of always being on, especially after having a good week of humorous stories, you then become known as the funny person or whatever label someone gives.

That expectation goes both ways.

Say I posted something that got 2 comments, the next day, my ego-tripping brain would expect @ least 2, hopefully 3 comments. And the next day I may have been a bit more witty so I got those 3 comments. Well surely 4 is to follow and on and on, but then comes the day I'd get one, or none. I'd wonder, "Where'd everybody go?"

So skimming thru my archives I found out some things about myself and it helped put get some perspective.

So where have my weight loss updates been as the 70+ (70?!?) Beaker Babes have checking in, pluckily losing pound after pound the last four weeks? In addition to downloading hellacious files on my dialup, I've been working on a few other web projects. Back in the spring, I started tracking my financial woes here, but never felt completely comfortable mixing the two situations. That discomfort has led me to setting up on another site.

For the past few weeks I've been procrastinating completing it. Why? Fear. I didn't really want to know. I mean the semi vague goal on this site was to pay off my credit cards, but the reality is I'm in a much deeper hole. For me to do this right, I needed to take a look at the entire picture, not just 3 bills. I found myself giving myself all sorts of starting dates, "I'll start the first of the month", for obvious reasons, "I'll start this weekend", even more obvious and usually became next weekend and finally "I'll start on the 15th". That was yesterday. I don't think the knot in my stomach could get any bigger. But I just swallowed hard and attempted to do just a few things from my to do list.

"Hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up and try to do the right thing, the dawn will come. You wait and watch and work: you don't give up." – Anne Lamott

Deconditioning, or losing fitness, when you stop training due to illness or injury is one of the 5 principles of conditioning. The principle of use/disuse refers to the 'use it or lose it' concept. However, how quickly you lose fitness depends on how fit you are, how long you have been exercising and on how long you stop.

Deconditioning theories are becoming more clear thanks to several research studies focused on aerobic fitness. One study had well-conditioned athletes who had trained for year stop exercise all together. After a three month hiatus researchers found that the athletes lost about half of their aerobic conditioning. New exercisers, however, didn't fare as well. Another study followed new exercisers through the conditioning and deconditioning process.

Sedentary individuals started a bicycling program for two months. During that time they made dramatic cardiovascular improvements and boosted their aerobic capacity substantially. Then they quite exercising for the next two months. When re-tested, the researchers found that these new exercisers lost all their aerobic gains and returned to their pretraining fitness levels.

There is also research being conducted that looks at decreases in training level, rather than completely stopping all exercise. The results are very promising and should provide comfort to athletes who need to cut back on training due to time constraints, illness or injury. One study followed sedentary men through 3 months of strength training, 3 times a week, and then had them cut back to one session per week. They found that these men maintained nearly all the strength gains they developed in the first 3 months.

There are also many individual differences in deconditioning rates, and it is impossible to apply all these studies to your situation. But it appears that if you can maintain some exercise on a weekly basis, you can maintain your fitness levels fairly well.

If you do need to stop exercise completely for several months it is difficult to predict with accuracy how long it will take you to return to your former fitness levels. Again, individual differences come into play. Some research shows that after a 3 month break, you can not return to peak condition in a week. In some cases, it takes as long as 3 months to regain all your conditioning. Here again, it seems to depend on your original level of fitness and how long you stopped.

The take-away for athletes who need to take time off is to try to do something at least once a week during your break, but don't quit completely. Cross-training through an injury is always a great option. [source]

"Victory is won not in miles but in inches. Win a little now, hold your ground, and later, win a little more." – Louis L'Amour

NutriSystem has these daily doses of wisdom, pep talks, reminders etc. The one for this morning was so good, I thought the Beaker Babes could get something out of it:

Ok—it's Sunday, and the start of a whole new week. A time for a fresh start. A sort of new mini-beginning. A re-birth! Yeah, yeah, right...yada, yada... you're probably saying to yourself. Ok, so maybe it is the end of summer, and your everyday routine is getting the best of you. Heck, maybe even your diet is getting the best of you. You know what? That's ok.

Maybe during these dog days of summer you find yourself saying things (at least in your head) like, "I'm so sick of having to diet." Or, "How come I'm the one who always needs to lose weight?" Or, "Why can't I be naturally skinny?" Or worse yet, "You know what, I just don't even care any more if I'm fat."

It's ok. We've all said things like this. We've all had those moments when the sheer fact that weight loss is even an issue in our lives just downright stinks. Of course we want to be healthy and fit, but sometimes, it's just plain tough to deal with it, day after day.

But here's the catch—it's what you "got" in life, and you need to deal with it.

There's a saying that says, "You get what you get, and you don't throw a fit." And while this mantra works very well with children when choosing popsicle flavors, it's also probably not a bad way to look at your weight loss journey, either.

Sure, we'd all like to be naturally skinny and beautiful, on the both the outside and inside. And sure, it would be great if we never had to workout but yet could still keep that potbelly at bay. But you know what? Most of us can't. It's just the way it is.

What's most important is how you deal with that fact—and that's exactly what you're doing on this program challenge. You're dealing—and we I commend you for that. We I know it's not easy, but you're doing what you need to do.

So as the summer sun continues to beat down upon us, we I say, keep up the good work—don't give up, and don't get discouraged. There are a lot worse things you could have to be dealing with right now besides the fact that it's probably not the best idea to scarf down an entire banana split.

You can deal with it. You already are—and you're doing a wonderful job.

Today kicks of week 4. Those of you playing @ home will realize, we are @ the ½ way point. 3 more weeks ahead. A lot can happen in 3 weeks, reasonably you can lose anywhere from 3-6lbs. Add to that what you may have already lost in the last 3 weeks will that earn you a beaker of fat? Awesome! Will it get you w/in a 1lb of a beaker, that is still pretty durn good. In other words, no matter what point you are @, now much you've lost (or not lost) to date, make the most of the final 3 weeks and maybe just maybe you'll end this all that much closer to your goals

"Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal." - Hannah More

"Worry is a misuse of the imagination." - Dan Zadra

"The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity." – Amelia Earhart

I used to be a video watching fiend. Scouring all the music shows for the latest fashions, hairstyles & dance moves, Lord knows why, I gots no rhythm. When I moved to Atlanta, and set up my first apartment I had all the comforts of home, especially cable TV. Until a few months later when I got something new that I didn't get from home. The expenses. Gas AND water bill? What kind of racket is this?!?!

One evening I came home from hard day of work and as per ritual flipped on BET. To this day I don't even remember the video but just like eating one too many bites of something sweet, I felt ill. That day was the end for me. The following month, I cancelled my cable and have been w/o it every since. That was also the day I silently mourned the future generations of girls & young women who now grow up with those constant standards of beauty. When I walk the streets of the ATL, NONE of the women I see look anything like what's on TV.

"There may be more to learn from climbing the same mountain a hundred times than by climbing a hundred different mountains." - Richard Nelson

I've been working offline on a few web projects. I'm getting pretty excited about the things I have lined up, but as per usual, I think of something tiny, like sand grains, and then my brain thinks of pebbles, then rocks, next thing I know I'm in front of a mountain. It's all good, I think all pieces play a role, but I don't want to bite off more than I can chew. One of the main things I need to do, is move the NS reviews off this site. The bandwidth is KILLING me. I've been looking into my options on how to do it as smoothly as possible. That's one.

Then I recently set up another site. After having major issues just getting MT to work properly, um I had to install that thing 5, FIVE! times, then gave up and moved to wordpress, then back to MT. *ugh* I'm a bit gunshy on diving into this backend site stuff right away. Blech.

So yea, that's why I'm *hardly* here and all my workout stats are outdated. It'll prolly take me the rest of this week to figure out all the things I'm trying to do, most of it relates to this site, setting up some new features and stuff (which is why NS reviews need a new home, I need that space) and one project is *gasp* totally unrelated to weight loss & health stuff. But it's up, now I just got to get it running.

All that to say, I'm here but I'm not. Beaker Babes seems to be handling themselves just fine. You ladies RAWK! Now I wish I made it a weekly weigh in thing and posted a beaker on the front page that increased with every lb shed. How cool would it be to watch all that gooey fat overflow. NOT!

Laters.

"If you wish to travel far and fast, travel light. Take off all your envies, jealousies, unforgiveness, selfishness and fear." - Glenn Clark

Weight management is a balancing act between taking in calories and burning them up. New research suggests that the way your body burns energy may be at least as important as how much you eat. Try these tips for keeping your body's idle speed high.

Yesterday I wrote about my support on the Dove Ads b/c they validated what I look like and represented fairly average bodies and the women appeared to have a healthy body image.

Then I got to thinking. Comedienne Mo'Nique has a show about overweight women vying in a beauty pageant. How would I feel if those women were in a similar ad by Dove? Honestly...I wouldn't have written about it. So what makes one weight range validate me but another not even register?

Though I don't discuss politics on my site for obvious reasons, I'm a political junkie. When I'm not chatting up weight loss stuff, I'm scouring my 10-15 news sites and gabbing on the phone about various issues. So that mental exercise, that analytical approach makes me see the politics in just about everything. Even weight. It's also why I tend to break stuff down and analyze issues the way I do.

"A bend in the road is not the end of the road...unless you fail to make the turn." - Unknown

When I originally saw the Dove ads drama I filed it away as something to rant about for another day. I tried not to read too much about what others said, so my thoughts wouldn't be too influenced, but I think my take may be a tad different than other well written heart felt responses.

W/o even reading the comments left on poundy, I remember thinking, big fricken deal they are showing "average" woman w/pudgy bellies and thick thighs in ads. Of all the images of women floated around, this is what the males (I'm guessing some females too) have chosen to make into a rallying cry?

How I feel about the ads, is very similar to how I feel about race and it's something so rooted in my very being I can not stop doing it. For the record and full disclosure, I am black.

"To be wronged is nothing unless you continue to remember it." - Confucius

This week's focus: Today kicks off Week 3! Stumbled in Week 1? Got back on track in Week 2? Week 3 to the rescue! Think about it, there are 4 more weeks in the challenge, so if you haven't lost, or even gained a tad, you can make a lot of progress in the next 4 weeks. Just take it one day @ a time, and here's a gentle reminder, if you find yourself doing something that'll impede your progress, take a second and ask yourself, "Will this bring me closer or further away from that pound I want to lose?"

Well done to everyone who checked in last week, even those who struggled. Why? B/c you checked in anyway which means you are not giving up. That my fellow Beaker Babes is a victory in it's own right.

"Good people are good because they've come to wisdom through failure. We get very little wisdom from success, you know." - William Saroyan

"To fight fear, act. To increase fear—wait, put off, postpone." - David J. Schwartz

I believe the messages we get about our body, which translates into how we approach & feel about weight loss, are multi pronged. On top of our own personality and lifestyle, there are many factors, people and situations playing a role.

Ultimately it is the individuals responsibility to make their own choice, but I don't rule out the pervasive message the media both blatantly and covertly hits us over the head with.

Let me be clear, I am not saying it's solely the media's fault.

However, since the media is showing no sign of changing it's message or going away, I've made my own choice of limiting what I watch, read & listen to.

So it's when I run across the following story, I just...oh I dunno...blow my top?

At some point over the last few months, it began to feel like an assembly line: Jessica Simpson, Nicole Richie, Lindsay Lohan ....

All of a sudden, you couldn't tell them apart: the drapey gowns clinging to skinny hips, the long blond tendrils falling over matchstick-thin arms, the smoky eyes accenting bottle-bronzed faces.

[snip]

...there's actually a mastermind behind this look-of-the-moment: celebrity stylist Rachel Zoe.

[snip]

She dresses some of the world's most visible teen idols for film junkets, premieres and magazine shoots.

[snip]

...her power as an image maker cannot be underestimated. A recent entry on a Lohan fan site read: "I would do anything to look like her!"

[snip]

Thinness is essential...(Fashion insiders have whispered privately that she is single-handedly bringing anorexia back.)

She's begun preaching the virtues of tan and slinky to the rest of America, as a regular contributor to Cosmopolitan magazine and a guest on "Oprah," and she was recently hired as a spokeswoman for GapBody, where her duties include "Bra Bar" fit clinics for customers, despite the fact that most days she doesn't even wear a bra.

I'm going to dissect this badboy one segment @ a time.

Continue reading In her image

"The thing you fear most has no power. Your fear of it is what has the power. Facing the truth really will set you free." - Oprah Winfrey

Marla brings up a good point about Jessica Simpson's booty this morning:

The photos showing her profile and front are of a person who is too skinny to have the butt shown in the last photo. Are these before-and-afters, or is it possible she's wearing a little booty padding?

If she were inclined to smilies I can almost picture her adding a face.

When I saw the Dukes of Hazard preview in the theatres a few weeks ago, there's a scene where she struts towards Enis and perches on his desk trying to get some info from him. Everytime I saw that scene, I thought, Boy her booty is flat. So Marla's comment, coupled w/ my flashbacks of the flatness has prompted me to get to the bottom [no pun] of this.

Here is the scene in question. It's hard to really tell b/c it's so small & fuzzy. But if you go see the movie this weekend, lookout for it.

Now it could be a few things. She could've shot those bikini pics early in the movie, before the butt muscles had time to plump up (Lord is this what my degree paid for?). Or, She could in fact be using butt padding in the shorts picture, hence the fullness and roundness (still shaking head @ my analyzing this).

I'm no doctor, but I tend to think you either got it or you don't. Not to say her booty couldn't have been made firmer, but for it to be so rotund and pop out and almost compete w/Beyonce or a Serena Williams for noticeablity, well that's where my ability to suspend belief ends.

Granted both B and Serena are arching themselves thereby giving the booty more of a poking out style, but Jessica ain't a stranger to the arching one's back game either.

What could be the deciding factor in all three is both B & Serena are wearing skin tight garments. Jess however is wearing the more bulkier garment, denim, which could in fact have been, *cough* padded.

Ladies & gents, I make no judgements or accusations, I'm simply presenting the facts. I rest my case.

Final Weigh in here.

To keep it less confusing, I am going to pull the beakers from all who posted to the final weigh in post. Based on 16 people (thru Renee, not me, her) checking in their fat loses as of 9/9, in 6 weeks the Beaker Babes have shed 100lbs of flab.

For the visually inclined it looks like this:

So let's keep the beakers coming! Add your beaker o' flab, no matter what size it is, to the cause. If for no other reason than having that much more gobs of fat sloshing around on the front page of my site. Oy.

I'm gonna try another way of broadcasting the 5lb Labor Day Challenge. Rather than have a thread pinned to the top each week, I'll leave a brief FYI @ the top with a link to that post. The reason? Well I'd hate for someone to feel bad if they haven't posted or feel pressured to have a good week or obligated in anyway. Plus seeing the reminder thread may lead to avoiding my site. Can't have that now can we

Seriously though, I know the emotional rollercoaster of challenges, starts off high, peters somewhere in the middle and if one is lucky, finishing is icing on the cake. With that said, I'll have a new category labelled Announcements which will provide all challenge info and necessary links.

"As difficult as it seems, you can be sure of this: At the core of the heart, you have the power to move beyond the old issues that are still hindering your freedom. The hardest things—the ones that push you up against your limits—are the very things you need to address to make a quantum leap into a fresh inner and outer life." - Doc Childre and Howard Martin

Mel!

Find her over @ Dieting is an evil word.

She shares her special day with the likes Mr. Bad News Bears himself, Billy Bob Thornton.

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via dietblog

"Jessica wanted more of a bump for her rear end instead of a flat butt," [I don't got that prob Jessie poo ] says Alexander, who works at Beverly Hills' Sports Club LA. He trained Simpson there nearly every day — one hour with weights and a half-hour of cardio. To achieve a toned butt and legs, Simpson took on a rigorous program of lunges and squats while holding 7 ½-pound weights.

[snip]

...Alexander, who encouraged Simpson to eat grilled chicken, seared fish, broccoli and asparagus. She avoided bread baskets brought to the table and declined extra sugar for her iced tea. Free desserts brought to the table were refused. [source]

In preparing for the role (and to be able to fit in those short shorts), Jessica first had to give up her No. 1 vice -- dessert! "She's a big sweet tooth person," reports Mike. "She likes to cook desserts -- brownies and cookies and banana pudding and stuff like that -- so she wasn't allowed to do that. And being from the South, she loves chicken fried steak and mashed potatoes and chips and hot sauce and Mexican food -- fried and carbs, basically -- so she had to give that all up."

So you know what's next right?

Simpson Launches Treadmill Line

The singer spent six days a week getting her body into the perfect shape for her role as sexy Daisy Duke in new movie The Dukes Of Hazzard and she's so impressed with the results she wants to give fans the chance to get into Duke shape.

[snip]

She says, "I have a workout video coming out and now everybody can do the Daisy Duke workout and I have a treadmill line that I'll be selling.

[snip]

"...I was in the gym six days a week, two-and-a-half-hours a day with a trainer."

Snark aside, there is no secret.

It's a given she may have access to some super secret celeb goodies the rest of us don't. Still, I commend her for keeping it real and not pretending she just looks like that. Hell she is childless and 25 and STILL had to workout @ least an hour a day to get that bod.

Tailor strength and cardiovascular workouts to your goals.

TO BUILD MUSCLE

1. Work to fatigue. Weight should be heavy enough so muscle is fatigued after 6 to 15 repetitions.

2. Add weight progressively. Start with one set, one to three times a week, with a weight that tires the muscle after 8 to 15 reps. Once that gets easier — usually in two to four weeks — work up to three sets. Then increase weight slightly and go back to one set, working up to three.

3. Include heavier weights. Once a week, hoist a weight heavy enough to fatigue you after three to five reps. Do two sets.

4. Fuel workouts. Before a strenuous session, Karen Reznik Dolins, an adjunct professor of sports nutrition at Columbia, suggested eating carbohydrates, and within an hour after, carbohydrates and protein.

TO LOSE WEIGHT

1. Focus on cardiovascular exercise. Do workouts like running or aerobics five or more days a week, for at least 45 minutes, but also include weight lifting one to three times a week, said Joseph Donnelly, the director of the Energy Balance Laboratory at the University of Kansas.

2. Be active throughout day. If you sit at a desk, get up and walk around for five minutes every hour.

3. Eat regularly. Pace meals and snacks every three to four hours for the right amount of calories when the body needs them, Dolins said. [source]
You may need to register to read. Make use of

Pretty much confirms an idea I flirted w/earlier this year. I also heard a naturopath say something similiar last week and also read this on a forum. Methinks it now sticks.

It'll be hard, if not impossible, for me to build muscle AND lose weight. My best bet is to work on maintaining the muscle I have or just try not to lose too much.

The naturopath said it takes quite a bit of protein in addition to some heavy resistance to add muscle and it doesn't just happen overnight. The forum said it's to be expected that some muscle loss will happen when eating restricted calories. It's only when bulking starts and calories are ramped up does one actually add muscle.

I dig that.

"Take it slowly. The deepest resentments are wrapped up in a lot of hurt and pain. We think we're protecting ourselves by not forgiving. Acknowledge that and go easy on yourself. Forgiveness means that you've decided not to let it keep festering inside even if it only comes up once in awhile. Forgiveness is a powerful yet challenging tool that will support and honor you, even in the most extreme circumstances." Doc Childre and Howard Martin

For almost a week now I've had some very vivid recurring dreams. I don't dream much but when I do, I'm usually going thru some emotional upheaval and they tend to last for days on end, and then suddenly stop.

It makes sense it started up last week and has been increasing in intensity and complexity every night. Even if I close my eyes to rest them, my mind races to people and places I haven't thought about in years. It's emotionally exhausting. B/c the dreams are so vivid and realistic, I wake up drained. It hurts my heart more times than not.

My mother told me it's a sign, especially b/c they are recurring dreams, of something I'm not dealing with. Blah blah blah, she's always right. As usual. Problem is, dealing scares me. Terrifies actually. And it's not something I can just snap my finger and say, today I'll handle it. So until I do the dreams will continue.

In the process of trying to get back to some of the basic things I used to do, like reading certain authors and going back to a time when I was less anxious, bitter and angry (still was that way but it's only increased over the years) I have started to find some quotes that's been resonating w/what I'm going thru I'll post them over the next few days.

The weight loss, the clutter, the need to forgive (myself & others), the urge to change, the dreams, are all related. Usually they are things I manage to juggle so that I can work on one @ a time, but lately it's all hitting me @ once, the primary reason I need to go dark for a bit.

The incoherence that results from holding on to resentments and unforgiving attitudes keeps you from being aligned with your true self. It can block you from your next level of quality life experience. Metaphorically, it's the curtain standing between the room you're living in now and a new room, much larger and full of beautiful objects. The act of forgiveness removes the curtain. Clearing up your old accounts can free up so much energy that you jump right into a whole new house. Forgiving releases you from the punishment of a self-made prison where you are both the inmate and the jailer. - Doc Childre and Howard Martin

"When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free." - Catherine Ponder

(No she's not on the birthday list, but I won't let that stop me from spreading some bday cheer to one of my favorite peeps.)

Lexy (I call her B)!

Find her over @ A continuing journey towards Smashitude as told by me.

She shares her special day with Public Enemy #1, Chuck D.

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Man, it's the first of August and by the time the 5lb challenge ends, it'll be Labor Day and then the start of Holiday Eating season.

Speaking of challenge, it's mentally hard for me to post both group challenge stuff and my normal chit chat. Somethings gotta give, so for the next few weeks my personal postings, if any, will be kept to a minimum. Besides, I'm diggin that the gung-ho group thing. It makes me excited.

The timing is great, I have a few other online projects I've been working on & would like to kick off. Plus I can spend some time tackling behind the scene stuff on this site. There's just not enough hours in the day to do all I'd like to get done.

It also coincides with me dealing w/one of my biggest fears and needing to just emotionally take a step back and mentally regroup from a couple of recent events.

So all that to say, I'll still be here, posting challenge related stuff, daily quotes, updating my weekly stats, posting to my training journal & any articles or tips I run across. However, I'll be on a bit of a hiatus from the daily chatter as well as chatter w/others via bloghopping. So if you visit daily and wonder, Hey what's going on w/Renee and her eating, or notice I haven't hopped to your site in a few weeks, this is why.

Renee's regularly scheduled programming will resume momentarily.

Atkins Nutritionals files for bankruptcy

Atkins has been hurt by waning popularity of its namesake diet, which focuses on eliminating carbohydrates such as bread and pasta to shed weight. The diet became one of the most popular in U.S. history, spawning a virtual cottage industry of low-carb regimens — but also drew criticism from experts for its focus on fatty foods and low fruit and vegetable consumption. [source]

Ironically in the last week I've been reading a lot about the wonders of protein My prediction? Get ready for the High Protein diet craze, coming soon to a supermarket near you. *snort*

"We probably wouldn't worry about what people think of us if we could know how seldom they do." - Olin Miller