Hey so you know how I'm a ryde or die Publix chick. I mean you couldn't pry me out of that store each week. Plus I kinda enjoyed having a girlie stalker who I may or may not have seen from time to time.
Well now that I'm all about the key fob, I decided to get a fob for every store I normally frequent. But let me back it up a bit, 'member my food shopping list?
How I do this is, I make my meal plan first, then I hit the grocery. Nowadays, I'm also about saving loot, and something about moving and having my routines all whacked out, means I now buy the Sunday paper and scoop up the coupons I may need and see what the specials are.
I cross reference what's on my list and voila, I have a plan of attack. I'm really flexible, say I need berries for my fruit, but peaches are on sale, I'll be a peach eating fool.
After doing some power shopping, groceries was last on the list, this way when I get them I head home. I went to Kroger first since they had the fewest items to pick up, Publix was gonna get all of my love.
First things first, I get fobbed.
Cool, nice juicy tomato.
I, HATING, Kroger w/every fiber of my being, decide to hastily pick up my 5-6 items and get the hell outta there. But, roaming around, I got tired and cranky and all of a sudden the Publix across the street seemed oh so far away.
I sighed and said, fuck it, I'm staying here.
Which meant I had to start all the way back @ the produce section so I could shop better. What I hate about Kroger, is the aisles are made @ weird angles. There are too many catacombs to get lost in. Publix is str8 forward. The aisles go up and down and when you exit, bam, there's the cashier.
Not @ Kroger, the aisles go on a diagonal, so...ah forget, it I can't even begin to describe.
I get all my items, picked up the remaining supposed-to-be-bought-@-Publix-produce and hit the line. Normally my food shopping runs me $50-60/week. Try as I might, even when I thinking, I don't need much stuff, I still end up $50 *curses softly*
I get scanned.
Hrmm…he didn't ask for the fob.
He totals me up I see $6---
I toss him the key chain.
[Lol @ proof #586 of how my life is an extended Seinfeld episode: Remember when they exchanged keys, George had Kramers and vice versa and Elaine and Jerry had each others. @ the end when Kramer tosses his keys @ Jerry and it's like a hundred keys on there? Yea that's me.]
He narrowly avoids being decapitated by my keys and swipes the card. All of a sudden the cash register goes nuts. I'm seeing is tons of Minus signs (-) and next thing you know, I'm @ $51 and change. I saved 9 bucks people.
9 whole bucks!
*happy snoopy dance*
I seriously wanted to leap the counter and plant a big fat one on his lips while dipping him backwards.
Instead, I looked fondly back @ the maize they call aisles and smiled.
Later, I went back out, I don't call it power shopping Saturday for nutthin', and make my way over to the other side of the street. I bound into Publix, beaming from ear to ear @ anticipation of my new Publix fob.
I head up to the front desk. "May I have a savings card?" I politely request.
Furrows brow?
Huh?
I scoop up my keys and show her, "Um...like this", not really wanted to show her Kroger, feeling like I'm not only cheating, but now I'm flaunting the evidence.
She stalls...Uh…we don't have that.
Me, being a dim bulb, "What? I don't understand."
We don't use those.
"Oh,"…my voice cracks a bit. "I see."
What can I say? It's been real, but it's over Publix. I never knew how to quit you, but think I just did.
