Daily Weigh In: 196 
Nutrition
- Post Workout: Protein Shake
- Breakfast: Soy Milk, Fiber 1, 12 blueberries & Raisins (whilst someone chows down on bacon & eggs *sobs softly*)
- AM Snack: Plain, non-fat yogurt, peach, 10 blueberries
- Lunch: Tuna, low-carb pita, packet of mayo & mustard, 5 teeny tiny itty bitty baby carrots, tomato
- PM Snack: Plum & protein bar
- Din Din: got in way too late to make dinner
- Final Meal: protein shake and banana (but didn't want to go to bed on a full stomach or hungry)
Water – 100oz + 12oz Ginger Tea
Vitamins/Supplements - Check
Training
Jump rope - TBD
30 mins elliptical - 1.67 miles
30 mins treadmill - 1.53 miles
Total cardio mins: 60
Total miles: 3.2
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As you can tell, summer edition reneegetsfit.com is in the house, the green striped background shoulda changed, if it hasn't refresh the page a few times. I still need to update the lb-o-meter, which really means removing the red bit of progress I completely lost and possibly making the graph show negative #'s as in, not only do I still need to lose 60lbs, I gained more than when the chart started.
I also *gulp* updated the logo and I'm sorry I don't have the heart to try to fit into those blue jeans.
I mean, I like to keep it real here and all and deep down feel in a few months when they do fit, in a few months when they do fit (had to say it again), I'll be all geeked about the before/after shot...but...considering I still have deep ridges in my waist from putting on the size L black 'kini and having a vague memory the last time I tried to wear those jeans they were crazy tight around the calf...THE CALF...well...I'm sure y'all will understand my reluctance.
It's also why I didn't update the pudge pics yesterday. Oh I took 'em. And while I'd like to believe I just caught myself @ a bad angle, they are harder than usual to look @. I know I joke and josh and jest about the plight of being overweight, but beneath the snark is quite a bit of hurt and shame.
Last night, I pretty much crashed and burned before the sun fully set. Little kids were still outside playing as I got under the covers. I'm sure a bit of depression was lingering overhead. But mostly it's my first time here w/everyone in the house. In times past, after a hard day of dealing w/people and pretending not to notice the ? mark in their eyes about my looks, and putting on a brave face and chipper smile till my cheeks ached, I came home to the privacy of my apt, and crawled into bed. I missed that today.
Added to the mix one of my larger anxieties last December, was knowing my fam would be here in a few months and see a Renee a good 50-60lbs heavier than they knew. I have deep shame about that.
*sigh*
But all that's neither here nor there.
Day 180 is on 7/6, for shure the jean pix will be updated then. Do I expect to drop a shitload of weight between now and then? Nope. But, unlike the last few weeks, I know I'm actively working out from now till then so as I said before, even if I look exactly the same as I do today, mentally I feel I'm headed in the right direction.
