Daily Weigh In: 196.2 
a gain again...get it? lest I go batshit crazy...I must 
. Besides, aren't I s'posed to be f.a.t. lbs?
Nutrition
- fiber 1, cheerios, vanilla soy milk, raisins
- cheerios, vanilla soy milk
- spaghetti, garlic bread, lasagna w/meat sauce, lemonade
Water
- 2 liters
Vitamins/Supplements
Check
Training
No workout
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To paraphrase one of my favorite quotes, when it becomes more difficult to suffer than change, one'll change.
****
Since forever I tend to be all about doing things the pure way. Well some things. I think it's cuz I don't know how to ask for help, so I don't know how to accept help and have been let down and abandoned way too many times to count, I just walled up. I feel like I'll be a failure if I don't "man up" and do the weight loss thing the real way, eat less+move more. Rather than use certain tools that are proven to work, I harbor a dream in 6-12 months I can look back and say, "Voila, I did it the old fashion way." [insert self-satisfied smirk]
But you know what? Today is 6-12 months from summer of 05/early 06. Guess what the old fashion way has netted me. I mean it. Guess.
Ding ding ding ding!!
MORE EFFING LBS!!!
14 more lbs than the start of the year and don't make me dig thru the archives to find the stats from last summer.
I sit here feeling all superior that I'm "keeping it real" while I'm utterly repulsed I can feel flab under my arm pits. And when I lean forward to get my water bottle, the rolls on the side of my tummy crease up and move.
To hell w/keeping it real. I did it that way for many years and my ass kept getting real fat.
****
Yesterday was trick #1. Today is trick #2.
I'm not gonna get all long winded about this in type, I talked it out in last nights podcast, but for a little while, I'm going to act as if, and I'll do the south beach diet. In recent weeks I was easing my way into good carbing it. Now I'll get stricter, phase 1 it for 2 weeks and see where that leads me.
One of the points I made in the podcast, as well as an email reply, is the last 6 months has been stressful. The last 2 months have been insane, and there are extremely stressful things I'm dealing w/that I just can't talk about here. B/c I was sustaining myself on tons of processed food and/or eating sporadically for so many months, it's only the last few weeks I've crawled out of that food coma. My goal for phase 1 is really to reset my metabolic clock if you will.
Yet another reason I can't whole-heartedly hit the beach, or any other restrictive name-brand diet, I refuse to believe eating fruits and some types of veggies can render me fat. Not buying it. No way. That said, I do believe, weeks and months of high processed carbs fugged w/my insides and going right into eating higher glycemic whole foods may have my body in a tailspin.
B/c that makes sense to me, I can lay off the fruit for a few weeks. How long do I plan to go? At the very least 2 weeks. Some things I found online said due to my BMI being over 30, I can possibly go 3, 4 weeks tops. For now I commit to 2.
I'll chat about the daily doings via the podcast, but for the most part I don't wanna make a big to-do writing about this...meh...in 5 years of blogging about weight...been there done that...feel me?
Coolio...off to find where I stashed my copy of the book. Something tells me it's packed tight in the garage. Oh well. Cheap ass Renee'll have to make a trip to the local library tomorrow evening. I did a quickie google and so far I've found in phase one:
...no corn, no sweet potato and no bananas...
Rats.
>:[
I'll live, folks, I'll live. 
As I said yesterday: Sacrifice. Discipline. Consistency.
