Sorry for the delay this week, I forgot to walk w/the update. But enough about me, lets get to the show.
It's a 2 hour event and while I started off writing about the high school hour, mid-way thru, it just didn't feel right snarking on them. Oh I wasn't making fun of the kids, I'd never do that, but you know, just being my usual flippant self, and I couldn't continue. The issue of childhood obesity is way too important. Instead I'll just recap the Losers. When the show is done, I'll post my thoughts on the high school portion. Fair enough? Good.
Now that the Biggest Loser: High School version is over, it's time to go back to the ranch for the final week.
They flash back to some of the older Ranchers and man oh man, w/the excess weight, I don't recognize them. It took me forever to realize that woman was Indiana Pam.
They are recapping the last few weeks and since I've already recapped this tedious season, I'm not doing it again 
They show Wylie the week he busted his @rse and lost nyet. He's never gonna live down pulling that 0lber is he?
Finally! The recaps are over! Tonight they face the scale one last time and say goodbye to the ranch forever. Looking @ them this week, they all look crazy slim.
Here comes the theme musicccccccccccccccccccccc
@ the ranch Kim gives them final instructions, they lead of w/Alaska Kai, please let that mean she gets the boot tonight.
New York Erik is lugging Trainer Bob around on a trolley...
...his shirt looks like mine used to, soaked...
W/her injuries, Utah Heather hits the pool.
Florida Wylie says there's lots of pressure tonight...
...and then proceeds to squat press 400lbs. I ♥ Wylie!
Arkansas Jaron says he's there reppin the guy who watches the show. Two months ago he was just some guy @ home and now here he is.
Bob says New York Erik is weighing in for everyone tonight. His blue team, the state of NY, his wife, himself, the planet earth, Bob's job. Oh Bobby I'm sure you'll work again, stop yer whining.
Kim tells Heather to do some sprints, but she refuses. Heather says Kim doesn't care and isn't listening, she wants creative workouts. Kim is tired of the excuses and doesn't think Heather is really pushing. Heather says Kim is full of shit. Kim says I know you are but what am I? Heather says, I'm rubber you're glue whatever you say bounces off me and sticks on you...
...they each try to get in the last word of this scintillating fight before storming off from each other.
Kim seeks out Kai for support...
...and tells her she's good enough to win it. Here comes the ugly Kai cry. Bleayuck. Lots of focus on Kai tonight. One can only dream of what that really means.
Bob and Erik revisit the route they took on the day 1 hike...
...Week 11 Erik is all blasé about it as they now jog over the spot Erik collapsed at...
Now Erik collapses alright…into a standing pushup w/Bob straddling his back. Erik triumphantly spits @ the ground that so cruelly mocked him before.
Bob tells Erik his next exercise is to think he can win this game. I wonder how many calories that burns. *snerk*
The next day the crew learns they'll be training the trainers...
...turnabout is fair play as it's Bob's turn to get Erik' s laser blue/black/brown eyes focused solely on him while Kim looks as if she wants to crap a brick...
payback is a beeyotch.
Erik declares he want to kill them, he wants to bring them to exhaustion and proceeds to do just that. Bob is still smiley faced w/sweat dripping from his eyelashes. Gawd that Bob is a freaking machine!
@ Kim and Bob showing off, as they both back flip across the field. Oh personal trainers, they are such a wacky breed. The trainers tell the Ranchers they love workouts. It's fun and one day they'll get to that point too.
Trainer hazing is over.
I was wondering who the hell that couple in gray was...
...why it's Matt and Suzy!
My precious Suzy. *waves @ the TeeVee screen*
They got engaged on the Today Show. In workout clothes.
Suzy and that karate kid kick she does always cracks my shit up.
Wylie, is such a hostess, he bellows out hearty hello to them. Matt says after the show, his weight went back up...
...he realized he had to do this forever. Now they train each other and workout twice a day.
Next day, Challenge time!
StTWA is in a hot pink top and what appears to be a black frilly skirt. Very cute. Now that the Ranchers are athletes, it's triathlon time. In his tight tee Wylie looks HAWT! Why that was awkward, they just cut to commercial break. Um, ok.
Back to the show, first up a 200yd swim, then they bike 5 miles, finally they do a 1.5 mile foot race. As an extra bonus, the trainers show up to cheer them along. As they proceed to swim, it looks like Heather is swimming in her weigh in gear!?!? WTF?
Wylie is struggling, they wait for him...awwww...team work! They want to do it as a team, no real winners/losers, even Bob is biking w/them. Heather falls behind, Kim waits for her. Bob is still publicly pleading for his job. He shouts out to the world how much he loves his job. Fine Bob, if Erik loses, I'll hire you, just shut it already.
While everyone else runs, Heather power walks. The guys are the first to burst thru the finish line. Can I just say the guys have bigger 
than Kai...
They retie the finish line tape so Heather can bust thru to...they are such saps. It's a softer kinder episode. I really like this show this week...only cuz it's all over next week. ZING!
Post race, they proceed to smother StTWA w/their sweat cooties...
...I bet she wants to cast a wicked spell on them all right now.
Time to revisit the doc. He'll be comparing blood test from first week to now. For obvious reasons, let's just call this guy Dr. McCreepy.
Nuff said.
Erik's on the examining couch. The first week he had so much fat, he was insulin resistant. Now w/regular exercise and good eating, his body is once again sensitive to insulin. There is no need for medication b/c he's taking care of it holistically. YaY for Erik! Yikes for Dr. McCreepy.
Time for The Last Chance Workout™. Kim's veins are throbbing out of her neck, why? She's only walking back and forth. Kai thinks she earned her shot in the final four, Heather thinks she's a threat to win it. Wylie wants to be in the top 4, Erik remembers his first weigh in @ 407lbs and Jaron is just plain old nervous and wants to win.
They trek to the weigh in, w/the dramatic shot of fire I swore I was watching Survivor 
StTWA is in BLACKKKKKKKKK! What is this, 11 out of 11 weigh ins she wore black? You know what they say, you can take the witch out of a sitcom, but you can't take the black out of a witch. Or something like that
As weigh ins go, the 3 people who's %-tage lost to body weight are guaranteed a spot in the final 4. The 2 below the yellow line face elimination.
Heather is up
174 -> 167 lost 7lbs/4.02%
Wylie looks like he's been eating the rinds of the lemons I've been gulping down these last 2 days…
Jaron
223 -> 217
6lbs/.69%
He's @ his college weight.
Wylie up
224 -> 217
Lost 7lbs/3.13%
I'm sure he was bracing himself for zero. To date he's lost 90lbs...another middle schooler is gone...hee!
Erik is up, needs to lose over 7lbs.
295 -> commercial break. They always pull this crap when it's Erik's turn. Bite me NBC!
As of now, Heather is in first place, this is one long ass commercial break. I was able to update 2 of my sites in the time it took for them to come back.
Back
295 -> 283
12lbs!/4.07%
He's lost 124lbs since arriving to the ranch. Bob picked the right guy on day 1. Buh-bye Jaron.
Kai must lose 6lbs to be in the final four
189 -> 185
4lbs loss
She and Jaron are below the yellow line. They did that weigh in w/o much fanfare. Not even a recap from StTWA about her %-tage lost. Do I have to crunch that number myself?!?
Oh, it's 2.12% thanks camera guy for the lingering shot ::kisses::
They are @ the elimination ceremony. This is how weird the show is tonight. No shots of them debating who they are voting for. No lasting plea from Bob to save his job.
StTWA is in black and also making a final appearance, her voluptuous .
Wylie picks the fierce competitor and biggest threat and Erik picks Jaron. No surprise to me, Homey got smoked.
Not only did they vote him off real fast, they ended this segment w/the quickness.
StTWA tells them it's time to take what they've learned @ the ranch, home. In a few months they'll return for the final show down and the Jell-O grand prize of 250k. Wylie, polite to the end, waves goodbye to her.
The final segment is of the losers, meeting the old them, they have a huge pic of their first weigh in and saying goodbye to their trainers.
Wylie is grateful to have had Kim in his life. Sees how sad he looked. Sees the hurt and cant get away from that pic fast enough.
Old Heather meets the new Heather same as the old Heather *snerk*
Erik sobs @ the old him. Bob saved his life. Literally.
The losers head home in limos.
Glimpsing ahead to next week, Kai and Erik are damn near unrecognizable. Wylie looks like an ironman. They show someone kicking a scale. I'm gonna guess it's Heather and she gained weight.
2 hour finale next week, see you then!
Note: Comments are now closed. Please use the contact form to leave a message.
I love the boob shaking smiley....I laughed out loud...twice!
Does Kai have 2 personalities, or is it just me. There are been so many episode where she goes sour to sweet to sour again, so quickly, I can only guess.
Oh well.