I was going to continue the train of thought from yesterday but the thing is, I lost interest. Being upset and depressed has a way of magnifying when I get into a reflective mood online. It's really best for me to lick my wounds, put it to paper offline, and be more proactive online.
Plus, I'm PAINFULLY aware of @ least 2 people I know in flesh and blood who read my site and as much as I try to pretend I don't know or that it doesn't bother me or that I don't care. I do, it does and it does.
Getting raw and dirty about what's going on isn't something I want them to know about so another reason for me to clam up on that part of my life.
Rather that continue w/where I was headed, I had 2 messages that came to me today. One was from, believe it or not, a Weight Watchers commercial. I forget all the blah blah blah points talk, but I do remember the voiceover chick saying, forget before, be an after.
And I caught Tiger Woods interview on The Today Show where he said last year, the year his dad died, was the worse year of his entire life and a year later he is having the best year ever, being married and having a baby.
It made me think as rough as the last few months and this current week is, who knows what August 2008 will bring. I can be in a completely different environment.
Things have a way of working themselves out and I have to trust it will continue to do so.
On a more positive note, it's something I've toyed w/for a few years and over the weekend I made the decision to go back to school in the Spring. I can start as early as January, provided I get all my stuff in or as early as March.
Depending on class schedules, I can do full time taking 3 classes in the evening and one on Saturday, but I'll settle for part time if need me. It's a community college and I'll be majoring in Health & Physical Education. I already have an AA in Multimedia and Web Design, but I'm pretty sure all classes won't transfer, so I'll do the CC to get all major/basic classes out of the way and then transfer to Georgia State where I'll either do exercise physiology, nutrition or double major in both!!
I'm still feeling mopey, it'll linger w/me for a while longer, but having done the research, printing out transcript requests from my old schools and mapping out how I can juggle school and work has taken me out of my funk for a few hours.
Plus, thought I always operated under the misguided thought that I had to "look" physically fit before I even attempted to help other people get physically fit is silly. I'm wasting time. Not to say I'd feel comfortable being a personal trainer when I'm currently considered obese, I also don't have to wait till I'm @ my goal weight to do something about it either.
I'll be offline for the rest of the week, my cousin is coming to town, my mother will also be back and work on the house will resume. I'll try to post back on Friday, I decided to start a 6 month challenge starting Saturday September 1st till March 1st, so I'll write up what I plan to do for the next ½ year.
